I’d rather not say it’s better to drink alone, but it is. Ok, maybe not alone but at least not in a crowded bar with a cover band that thinks a tambourine compliments every song from Sublime to Alice in Chains. It does not. Please tambourine responsibly. My issue is that I’m in my late 20’s and never really did the bar scene thing. I had a group of friends who preferred to sit around a bonfire and play their own music than do the bar thing. Anytime we did do the bar thing we usually ended up grouchy and back at home lighting a fire anyway. Now that I’ve moved and am on my own with different friends I still don’t do the bar thing very often. Here is why.
There are three problems with my social skills or my person in general that make it a bad idea for me to be out at bars. First, and most obvious, I’m moderately tattooed. Why is this an issue? Well, aside from accepting the fact that I will always be donning elbow length sleeved shirts in the workplace for the rest of my life, there is something about my arm art that draws people in like bugs to a zapper. When you are tattooed you must resign yourself to the fact that strangers are going to touch, grab, stroke, poke, and otherwise grope, often from behind and by surprise. I once had a woman grab and swing me around while saying, “Whoa, let me see that! What have you done to yourself? Why?!” If you are unsure let me tell you, this is an impolite and inappropriate way to ask someone if you may look at their tattoos. So, please do not do this. Perhaps it’s because I’m a female and completely unintimidating, and my tattoos are flowers. If I were a skin head with demons vomiting swastikas and bloody eyeballs they more than likely would not touch me. So, if random people in malls, restaurants, etc. do this then you can only imagine what it’s like in a bar full of drunk people. For example, “Hey. Hi. Hi. I hafta see whatcha got there. Over there. Yeah, on yer, yer arm. Explain dat.” I give a very quick tat tour. “I like them. Yeah, I like that it has like meaning and it’s not like you know like meaningless.” I thank them and try to leave until the same interaction happens a few moments later, possibly with the same person.
Second problem is me. I am nice. I make a conscious effort to be nice to people, smile, and be friendly…if I’m approached. Otherwise I am usually trying to avoid eye contact, but that’s a different issue. Moving right along. Smiling, being nice, and talking to people encourages them to keep talking, to invite friends to the table, and to never ever leave you alone. This is bad and I usually need someone to save me otherwise I end up making a lame excuse, “Hey my mom is calling me I gotta get my bike home before it rains, see ya!” And then I just move to the next table and pretend I’m a stool.
Third, I’m loud. I’m excitable. I’m hyper. I feed off attention. I’m a constant source of entertainment, or so I‘ve been told. I also like to knock things over, pick people up, yell, and otherwise make a fool of myself. This can happen quickly. Usually within the time frame of three drinks. Doing this in the privacy of a house party is one thing, doing this in public in the age of camera phones, videos, and Facebook is a terriblehorriblenogoodverybad idea. Thank goodness I have yet to completely embarrass myself in public (that I choose to remember). But, I thoroughly believe that people need to be uninhibited from time to time. Even moderation should be taken in moderation. People need to loose themselves if only to realign, rediscover, and reassure themselves of who they are, want to be, or are becoming. Is this dangerous? Possibly. If you lose yourself at the wrong place with the wrong people, say, for example, a company holiday party, you will definitely lose more than yourself come Monday morning. But, we all need to jump on a table and rock out to Ram Jam’s “Black Betty” every once in a while (I highly recommend doing this).
For me, I much prefer the house party to the bar. I hate the music, being randomly touched, having to interact with unwanted drunks, and not being allowed to flip tables or break bottles. Although, if you want to buy me a drink I probably won’t turn you down, but then again you might be disappointed that it’s only one and I’m going right home. Also, I’ll complain about the music…just sayin’.
No comments:
Post a Comment